As a Man Thinketh so is He

“The mind is everything.  What you think you become.”

– Gautama Buddha

For some reason the words suffer and golf seem inexorably intertwined.  Now I’m not talking about suffering of biblical proportions, like that of Job, the Jews in Egypt, or Chicago Cubs fans, but the type derived from punishing self-directed words, thoughts, and emotions—a type most golfers seem all too familiar with.  That quote from Buddha was supposedly uttered almost 2,500 years ago.  And so while that was at least a couple of thousand years before modern golf was invented by the Scots, that statement is so applicable to the game that I would swear (not on the Bible, of course) that old Gautama must have at least been familiar with Chuiwan, the primitive form of the game that scholars now say originated in China around that time.

It should be an obvious thing to avoid, but it is amazing how many people who play golf talk to themselves on the course in a very negative way.  Chump, hacker, duffer, and choker are words in every golfer’s lexicon and ones that are far too often self-directed.  Your brain is amazingly receptive to the power of suggestion.  This is why hypnosis is so effective on so many people.  What your brain repeatedly hears, it will soon begin to believe, and while there is a steady drip of brain chemicals at work that explain scientifically what happens when we hear an unending barrage of self-directed negativity, for the sake of simplicity, let’s just say your thoughts control your mood.  Literally.  And if you are in the habit (or trap) of constantly talking to yourself in a way that is less than positive, you will ultimately adopt that as part of your identity, and your mood will never be primed to play your best golf.

So let’s take a quick look at some of the bad habits of thought most negative self-talkers suffer from and a little something they might be able to do to change.

1. Catastrophizing:  Most negative self-talkers are masters at looking at any given situation and distilling it down to only the negative possible outcomes.  It may be difficult at first, but you need to accept that at least some good can come from nearly every situation, even if it’s only a lesson to be learned, and just because you hit a branch no bigger than your pinky finger 200 yards away that kicked your ball O.B. right off the first tee, it is no reason to slump your shoulders and exclaim, “Here we go again.  Stick a fork in me.  This round’s done!”  Again.
2. Personalizing:  Negative self-talkers have a hard-wired need to blame themselves for everything that goes wrong.  Bad breaks are bad breaks, bad bounces are just bad bounces, and bad luck is exactly what it is, not some karmic hand of the universe reaching down to punish you for that piece of Halloween candy you stole from your sister back in the third grade.
3. Polarizing:  Everything is too often black and white, wrong or right, or good or evil for those in the habit of self-flagellation and there is no gray area.  Consider the wisdom of Buddha’s “Middle Way” and the fact that you, your game, or the next round doesn’t have to be blissfully bogey-free in order for it not to be a total disaster.  I’ve been witness to more than a few course records being broken over the years, and not even one of them was accomplished without at least one bad hole.

Proverbs 23:7 says, “As a man thinketh so is he!”  And while those words weren’t written quite as long ago as Buddha’s, it should be obvious by now that the ancients had something figured out long ago that many of us are still struggling to accept.  What you think, you will ultimately become.  So whether it’s on the golf course, the tennis court, in the boardroom, or anywhere else in life, make a pact with yourself to stop suffering from this type of talk.  Remember that each hole is a new hole, each round a new round, and (as long-suffering Cubs fans can attest) each new spring is a golden opportunity to begin the quest anew, as long as we train ourselves to think of it that way.  I’m not saying that freeing yourself from the limitations of negative self-talk will guarantee you’ll be angling for the PGA or LPGA Tour anytime soon, but I am guaranteeing that it will make it a whole lot easier for you to play your best game and to start enjoying yourself on the course and elsewhere a whole lot more.

This article is an exerpt from Mike Dowd’s book Lessons from the Golf Guru: Wit, Wisdom, Mind Tricks, & Mysticism for Golf and Life which is available for purchase on Amazon.

Cover Photo via Flickr